I've never been opposed to a bit of innocent blasphemy...

And so, I present to you, The SIX Commandments of the Religion of Undying Devotion to Coffee. 1. Thou shalt treat coffee as the supreme example of the caffeine based beverage; above tea, soda, and energy drinks; as your lord coffee can get kind of pissed off when you go around drinking other such beverages in large amounts. 2. Thou shalt drink thy coffee virgin, that is, without cream or sugar(my dad says Baileys and Whiskey are ok) unless thou forgets. 3. thou shalt give praise to the Almighty as many times a day as you want--the more, the better, as this is your own energy we're talking about. 4. Thou shalt purchase the highest quality beans and coffee thy money can afford; thou shalt grind thy own beans, as this makes the beans all the better. 5. Thou shalt be especially thankful in the direction of the following people for the following things: the turks, for thier endless list of innovations and the turkish press; the French, for french Roast and the French press; the Italians, for Espresso, Cappuccino, and a variety of other musicall bold blends, the Sumatrans, for their beans, the Columbians, for their beans, and diners such as Round the Clock for having a hardcore wait staff with an endless cup. 6. thou shalt listen to every one of these words and more, as I wrote them when under the influence of a triple espresso.